Talk Show
by LonelyArtist
Summary: The Sonic characters are put through high-profile interviews. Innermost secrets are revealed, one chapter at a time!
1. Episode 1

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone in this story, except LonelyArtist, who's me.

And now on to the story!

**Talk Show #1**

**Cameras On**

_Announcer: "Hellooooooooo Readers! Welcome to LonelyArtist's Talk Show! Today's topic: Knuckles the Echidna! Who is He? What does he do? Is he gay? That and more in this episode! And here's your host: LonelyArtist!"_

LonelyArtist walks on to the stage and sits behind a big desk. She has long, red hair in a pontail, and is wearing black, baggy clothes, and glasses. LonelyArtist turns to the audience, who are cheering like mad. She takes her hand and lowers it, and the cheering dies down. Then she raises it and the cheering starts up again. Lowering her hand again, she smiles, contented.

"Welcome, welcome, to the first ever episode of LonelyArtist's Talk Show! As a thirteen year old authoress, I didn't expect such an applause!" LonelyArtist says.

"Hey, boss!" a voice from offstage says, "what do I do with this recording? You know, the one of people 'applausing'?"

LonelyArtist licks her lips. "Coke48kenshin?" she says. Oh yes, for the real Coke48kenshin, thanks for "letting" me use your pen name. "You're fired!"

"Aaww..." Coke48kenshin says, the audience hears footsteps and a door slamming.

"Anyway," LonelyArtist says enthusiastically, "During the show, you may all call me L.A.! It's much easier to type than LonelyArtist. See? LonelyArtistLonelyArtistLonelyArtist takes me about ten seconds to type, while LA.L.A.L.A. takes me about five." L.A. smiles. "And now without further ado, let's send in our special guest, Knuckles the Echidna!"

A red...thing...comes from stage right (for all you people who don't know, that's from the left in the audience's point of view). He walks across the stage through the "applause" and sits silently on the couch next to the desk. He rolls his eyes.

"So, Knuckles!" L.A. says brightly. "The first question I have for you is... what exactly are you?"

Knuckles scowls. "I'm an echidna. I am not a bird, or a reptile, I'm a mammal, even if the females lay eggs. And I'm not a marsupial!" he yells at the computer screen (, if you're reading this, I'm extremely sorry, but he's not a marsupial!).

"Ookay, then," L.A. says, forcing a smile. She picks up a walkie talkie and whispers into it. _"I'm afraid of getting sued. Go take care of for me. Over." _LonelyArtist puts away the walkie talkie and smiles, showing her gums. "Anyway...Knuckles. Can you tell us a bit about yourself?"

Knuckles gives a stupified expression. "I'm an echidna. I protect the master emerald."

L.A. sighs wearily and puts her head in her hands. "No," she says in a distant sounding voice. "I mean, what do you do with Sonic and the gang?"

Knuckles left eye twitches. "Well," he says is a mechanical voice. "I, er, do things with 'Sonic and the g-- WHY THE ((beep)) IS IT '_SONIC _AND THE GANG!'" Knuckles bursts, jumping up with such a start that the heavy armchair topples backward. L.A. and the audience edge as far away from him as they can without leaving their seats. "I MEAN, I'M THERE, TOO!" he continued, oblivious to the reactions.

L.A. stands up and grabs Knuckles' shoulders, trying to calm him. Struggling, she yells for security. "Security! Security!" When nothing happens but most of the audience fleeing, she mutters, "I forgot...to hire...security." And wacks her forehead. Knuckles runs away, destroying things. L.A. groans. "Coke48! Help me!" Before the cameras click off, you hear, "D--crap, why'd I fire her?"

PLEASE STAND BY...

WE HAVE HAD TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES. WHILE YOU WAIT, WE WILL PLAY THE MOST ANNOYING SONG ON EARTH.

_"I love you, you love me, we're a great big family, with a great big hug and a kiss from me to you, won't you--_AAAAAH!"

"DIE!"

"Welcome back to the show," L.A. says, hastily concealing a smoking pistol under her desk. Knuckles is struggling in a straight jacket, tied to the armchair. "Now Knuckles..." L.A. begins. Knuckles mutters something incomrehensible. L.A. pretends not to hear and smiles into the camera. "Knuckles, it's now the part of the show where we take questions from viewers and audience members. The first question..." L.A. randomly pulls a laptop out from under her desk and types a few things. "Our first question is from someone named Anonymous. She says: 'What are your feelings for Rouge?'"

Knuckles facial features seem to soften a little. He speaks in a voice that sounds like it was dipped in honey. "Rouge..." he says softly. "Rouge is just an enemy... nothing more..." he sighs and his eyes half close.

L.A. looks into the camera, a smirk on her face. She stands on her desk and, much to the audiences surprise, strikes a match. She raises it to the smke alarm, and the sprinklers go off. The audience screams and half of the half that was left ran off. Knuckles woke up from his day dream with a start. As the sprinklers turn off, L.A. smiles and looks at Knuckles. "This is the last question of the day, Knuckles. And here it is..." the audience left leans forward in their chairs, waiting for their cue to leave. L.A. lifts a notecard and reads what's on it: "Knuckles the echidna. How does it feel?"

Knuckles raises an eyebrow. "How does what feel?"

L.A. gives him a questioning look. "Well, being gay of course!"

Knuckles lets out a yell. He breaks the straight jacket and roars. L.A. topples over laughing. The audience screams and runs for their lives as Knuckles runs around yelling "I'M NOT GAY! I'M NOT GAY!"

As the studio is in an uproar, L.A. turns to the camera and says, "That's our show! Stay tuned for the next episode of LonelyArtist's Talk Show: Scaring off the audience one member at a time!" The camera draws back and you see L.A. leaning back in her chair as Knuckles runs around screaming and the audience members knock down chairs in their escape.

**Cameras Off**

_There you go. Talk Show #1 is done. I hope you liked it. I wrote this in ten minutes, so it's not very good. Please review, but don't insult me too bad. :) Anyway. I don't know if I'll do another one, but if you for some reason wanted me to, you can review me recomending the topic and a few questions to ask._

_And a few things: Coke48kenshin, I know you won't report me, but , please don't. I didn't use your pen name, but you might know who you are. Sorry..._

_Please review. I know this was a crappy story, but again, I did it in ten minutes._

_LonelyArtist, over and out..._


	2. Episode 2

Disclaimer: I don't want to write this because someday I _will _own all of SEGA!

(WARNING: May not actually someday own all of SEGA. All Sonic, Shadow, etc., belong to the afore mentioned.)

_Yay! I got three reviews in one day! And better yet, all three were positive! Yipee! Double exclamation marks! Yipee!!_

_Anyway, only one of them told whom to interview, so I'll do that one! Yay!_

**Talk Show #2**

**Cameras On**

((applause))

_Announcer: Hellooooooo again, Rrrrrrrrrrrreaders! Welcome back to LonelyArtist's Talk Show, where we interogate superheroes' personal life! Today's topic: Shadow the Hedgehog! What's his origin? Where does he live? Does he have DNA? That and more on today's episode! And now, without further ado, let out a round of applause for LonelyArtist!_

((applause))

Some bum walks on stage, and sits behind her desk. He's wearing similar clothing, only this time... it's a he. He puts his feet up on her desk and lowers his hand. The "applauding" dies away.

"Welcome, welcome, to LonelyArtist's Talk Show. I'm not your usual host, I'm just a big fan who bribed LonelyArtist into doing her show. And no, LonelyArtist is not tied and gagged in a stall in the men's bathroom."

The crowd murmers amongst itself.

The bum continues. "I was curtiouse enough to put her into the women's bathroom."

A blond girl in a biker outfit comes from stage right and handcuffs the guy, pushing him torwards back stage. She looks torward the audience and yells, "I'm Coke48! I'm back! Cheer for me!" One person is heard clapping. ((clap...clap...clap...clap...))

A few minutes later, LonelyArtist comes and sits behind her desk. She spits a dirty sock out of her mouth and looks torward the front. "He's like Penelope from the Amanda Show." A few people chuckle hesitantly. "That wasn't supposed to be a joke. Anyway, thanks for coming back after that first episode. I got better reviews than I thought. But seeing as Shadow isn't as sycho as my Knuckles, I can't gurauntee a strong response. Also, a few things before we bring Shadow out...

"I've had some complaints from the gay/lesbian crowd about the last episode. I'd like to say that am not, in fact, against homosexuals, in fact, I'm all for their support. I only did last weeks episode because there's been a few questionings in fanfics about Knuckles' sexual orientation. So there. Also, on a more personal note, my glasses broke today, they're taped up now, and my mom turned fifty. And now, who you've all been waiting for, Shadow the Hedgehog!"

((applause))

Shadow walks from stage right and sits on the armchair, the latter then collapsing. Shadow for a brief second goes buggeyed. He examines his waistline. L.A. smiles. "You're not getting fat Shadow, the chair leg broke after Knuckles' recent rampage." Wordlessly, Shadow nods, takes off his right shoe, sprays it with a hidden bottle of Oust and props his shoe under the missing chair leg.

The audience gasps at Shadow's lack of shoe. Shadow lifts his foot to look at it. L.A. leans over her desk to get a closer look. The cameras zoom into it. A red scar runs from the top of his foot to the space between his first two toes. L.A. goes back behind her desk and puts on a puzzled face.

"So Shadow..." Shadow looks up, seemingly startled. "My first question then is.. where'd you get that scar?"

Shadow looks down in his lap for a few seconds before answering. "I got it when I was little."

L.A. sighs. "This is the thing with the animals I interview. They don't give me straight answers. What _happened_?"

Shadow keeps his head down. "I wanted to see if I had blood..."

L.A. displays a look of guilt. "So... do you?"

A drop of water hits Shadow's leg, making the fur bristle. He shakes his head. When he looks up, his face is the same unfeeling face as always.

L.A. cringes slightly. She smiles weirdly and says in an attempted cheerful voice, "Hm. Anyway, that most people, Shadow, would like to know is, what exactly is your origin?"

Shadow's eyes cloud over. He is silent for a second. He speaks in a low voice, "I was created by Professor Robotnik, out of hedgehog DNA and human brain cells."

L.A. blinks. "Okay, then. Well folks, that's his origin. Now, Shadow, have you ever felt remorse for this origin, lonely without parents?" L.A. leans a little over her desk and gives him a consoling expression.

Shadow's eyes uncloud and a shiver runs down his body. He looks intently at L.A. "I do not, have not, and will not have any form of emotion. So no, I feel no remorse." A twitch...twitches...on Shadow's right shoulder.

L.A. sighs. _"I'm never going to get any humor out of this guy," _she mutters to herself. "Shadow, could you tell me, why _don't _you have any feeling?"

Shadow speaks low and clear. "I was designed to be mentally pure, thus no emotions have been programmed into me. Emotions would just get in the way of thought."

L.A. raises an eyebrow. "'...programmed into...' so are you, like, a robot or something, Shadow?"

Shadow smiles ever so slightly. "Or something."

L.A. bangs on her desk. "Augh! Explain, will you!"

Shadow's face is unfeeling once again. "I'm not a robot, but like a robot, I'm emotionless, bloodless, and was programmed by a scientist."

L.A. groans slightly. "Good enough. Alright, next question. Where is your home?"

"Planet Earth."

L.A. rolls her eyes. "Planet Earth! That's not very specific. Doesn't everybody?"

Shadow shrugs. "Well, more specifically then, I am currently living in Kansas."

L.A. looks surprised. "Kansas."

Shadow half-smiles again. "Yeah, you know, where Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz lived. 'I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog, too!'"

L.A. nods, impressed. "You do an excellent imression of the Wicked Witch."

"Thank you." Shadow's face is once again emotionless.

"So here's another question, Shadow, have you ever considered show business?"

"No."

"Just like that, no?" L.A. asks.

"Yes."

"You did consider show business?" L.A. asks, confused.

Shadow sighs. "I have not considered show bussiness."

"Oh." L.A. says, a bit disappointed. "So what's your current job?"

Shadow looks at her. "Rival of Sonic the Hedgehog."

"No. I mean, what's your day job, a job that pays _cash?_"

Shadow nods. "Oh! Yes, that. I work as a McDonald's mid-level manager."

L.A. nodded. "That's somewhat impressive!"

Shadow rubs his...fingernails...on his chest and blows on them, then admiring his reflection. "Yes, I am all powerful."

L.A. snorts. She then clears her throat and looks back at Shadow. "Alright, Shadow...you mentioned something before that you had the DNA of a hedgehog...?"

"And the brain cells of a human, yes."

"Could you delve a little deeper into that for us?"

Shadow now clears his throat. "Well...I don't know if there's much to delve into...but...I was, could you say, asexually reproducted. It was only one hedgehog's DNA, not two. The DNA came from a female, African hedgehog named Tinna. She has since died. The brain cells, came from a human male of the age of six. I think he was European, named Benno...He should now be about 30, but I have no idea if he's still...with us."

"How'd you find all this out!" L.A. asks, bewildered.

Shadow shrugs. "Made it up."

L.A. sighs. _"I am now on the brink of insanity..." _she whispers to the voices inside her head: Katelyn, Josh, and Niera. She sits back up. "So, now Shadow. The last question of the day. A friend of mine is inquiring: are you related to Hiei Jagonshi, a demon from the television show Yu Yu Hakusho?"

"Yes, that I am."

L.A. goes bug-eyed. She stands up from behind her desk, walks in front of it, and gets down on her knees in front of Shadow. "No..." she says softly, then louder, "Say it isn't so! I'm close to hating that show! How could you be related to _Hiei_!"

"I'm kidding, I'm not related to anyone!" Shadow says nervously.

L.A. stands up with a start. "I'M CONFUSED!" she roars.

**Cameras Off**

**Cameras On**

"DON'T YOU TURN OFF ON ME! I WAS JUST ABOUT TO END THE SHOW ANYWAY!" L.A. yells into a camera, her face right up to the lens. The audience is fleeing and Shadow is sneaking away. L.A. then clears her throat. "Okay, bye now, everyone! This has been LonelyArtist's Talk Show: Let's see how long the host can keep her sanity!"

**Cameras Off**

_Ugh. That one didn't go so well. I was trying very hard to get this one done. It was all your fault people, if you hadn't told me to write more, MORE, this one might have gone better! No, I'm just kidding. It's not your fault. It's just that it is now 10:30 in the morning (pretty early for me, I'm usually not wide awake till eleven), and my glasses are still broken, so I'm doing this bare-eyed. Also, I'm under a lot of stress and... well, you know where I'm going with this. All around bad week._

_So please review. And tell me who you'd like interviewed. I might be able to a combination of two, but probably not. And please, if you have a character preference, don't feel afraid to recomend some questions to ask him/her. It'll really help._

_Oh and, I'm sorry about this episode. I had to tweak a few character personalities and facts. But if I hadn't, this story would be only a documentary. So yeah. Review me._

_LonelyArtist, over and out._


	3. Episode 3

_Woohoo! Another episode, comin' atcha! I'm doing the recommendation of the first person who reviewed episode two, I think it was Marie the Hedgehog or someone. So yeah._

_Sorry I took so long to write. I was at this camp. But now I'm back. So yeah._

**Talk Show #3**

**Cameras On**

((applause))

_Announcer: Weeelcoome baaaaack Rrreaders! This is the third episode of LonelyArtist's Talk Show! Today's topic: Tails the Fox! How much of a genius is he? Why does he have two tails? Has he ever been to Hawaii? That and more on today's episode! And now, give a round of applause to your host, LonelyArtist!_

((applause))

LonelyArtist walks on stage. She sits behind her desk and sticks a piece of bubblegum under it. She smooths back her hair and looks to the cameras. "Hey, ya'll episode number three! Yeah! A few announcements: My glasses are still broken, and there's a cricket in my computer room. And now on to business." LonelyArtist turns around in her swivel chair and clicks a button on a remote. The white wall behind her suddenly shows an enlarged photograph of Tails' face.

L.A. turns back around and shows an expression of utter stupification. "That was on the request of our little egomaniac, Tails. Oh yes, one more thing, Tails fans, you might not want to read this episode. I myself am not too fond of the little freak, so there may be a few unflattering comments. And now we bring on our 'guest of honor:' Tails..." she said despondantly **I actually don't know exactly what that means, so if it means something else, don't laugh about it.**

((applause))

"STOP 'APPLAUDING!'"

((chiiiirp chiiiirp))

Tails walks on in a lopsided strut. He gets to the chair, smooths back his "hair," and sits down quaintly. He smiles into the camera, and his teeth gleam.

A sweat drop appears on L.A.

"Who's messing with the animation!" she yells. "I HATE ANIME! SO MUCH SO MUCH SO MUCH!"

"Sorry boss!" A voice from back stage yells. L.A. gets up and goes back stage. _Boom Pow Ouch Screech!_

"Sorry about that," L.A. says as she sits back down behind her desk. "Coke48kenshin is back." She forces a smile and turns to Tails. "So Tails, I understand you understand you'll be asked questions that you might not understand?"

Tails looks confused. "I don't understand."

L.A. smiles consolingly. "I understand."

"What?"

"Nevermind. Well, my first question is...why are you such a freak?" L.A. grins evilly.

Tears well up in Tails' eyes. "I'm not a freak..." he whimpers.

L.A. closes her eyes in frustration. "Yes you are!" she yells. "You're a little terd! I mean, come on! In SA2B, you're all: 'Well I know one thing. We all did it together!' I mean come on! You're such an idiot!"

"I am not!" Tails yells defensively. "I've got an IQ of...um...300!"

L.A. leans back in her chair. "Suuuurre ya do."

"I do!" Tails cries. Literally. He starts to cry.

L.A. rolls her eyes. She looks up at the ceiling and mutters, "What did I do to deserve this?" She looks back at Tails, who continues to sob. "Alright, terd-breath. Next question. How much of a genius are you."

Tails perks up. "I'm a suuper genius!" He beams.

"Uh-huh. Whatever. The correct answer is: 'I'm a stupid genius! I switched brains with a chimpanzee, and now he's a babbling idiot!"

Tails raised his eyebrow. "Wouldn't that mean that I'm smart, if I got a smart brain?"

L.A. groaned. "You're supposed. To be. Insulted."

"Oh," Tails blinks. "Take that back!"

"No. Okay next question. Why are you such a goody-two shoes?"

Tails smiles. "Oh, I'm only good on the outside. On the inside, I'm an evil maniac, trying to kill Knuckles---"

"You can't kill my Knuckles!" L.A. interrupted.

"Um, okay..." Tails says. "You were supposed to be scared and beg for mercy but, um...You wanna see how well I can curse!" He asks enthusiastically.

L.A. blinks. "Um, no...That's oka--"

"You ((beep)) ((beep)) hole! I hope you ((beep)) a ((beep)) ((beep))! ((beep)) you!" Tails raises his hand, which is then blacked out by the cencors.

L.A. gets up and slaps him across the face. "Bad Tails! Swearing is bad! Don't use those words!" Coke48kenshin runs in and hands L.A. a bar of soap, then runs off. L.A. shoves the bar of soap in Tails' mouth. "Bad boy!" she screams.

L.A. storms back to her desk and sits down. She looks at the audience and says, "And if any of you swear like that, you're punishment won't be that bad, it'll be much worse!"

Half the audience quietly leaves.

"Fine! Go swear where I can't hear you! I'll find you all!" L.A. screams.

Tails spits the bar of soap on the floor. He coughs three times and says. "Um...I know where you can get a great deal on a straight jacket. And I've got a coupon, too! You want the coupon, ma'am?" Tails asks sweetly.

L.A. swivels around to look at Tails darkly in the eye. Tails lets out a muffled shriek. But she only nods and says, "Yeah, give it to me. I might need it." Tails hesitantly hands her the coupon. L.A. pockets it quietly. "Okay next question," she says kind of quietly. "Why do you have two tails."

Tails speaks slowly and calmly. "Actually, I wasn't born with two tails. When my father died, I had his tail stitched on with plastic surgery. That way I can remember him."

L.A. looks down. A drop of water falls on her pant leg. Tails frowns. "What's wrong LonelyArtist?"

L.A. shakes her head. She says in a kind of bubbly voice. "Nothing. I just--I just know how you feel. My dad died, too." The audience ohs.

Tails nods. "May I pat your hand?"

Still looking down, L.A. is silent for a while. Then she says, "Yeah."

Tails reaches over and pats her hand. L.A. shoots her head up. Her teeth froth. "Don't touch me you little cretin!"

Tails draws back. "But you said--"

"Well I changed my mind!" L.A.'s eyes grow red. She stands up and her chair topples over. "Next question!" Tails nods slowly. "What kind of weapons of self defense are you carrying!" She roars.

"N-nothing!" Tails says quickly.

L.A. smiles and rubs her hands together. "Peeeerrrrfect..." she laughs slightly.

Coke48kenshin comes on stage, grabs L.A.'s shoulders and steers off stage. On her way out she pulls the coupon out of her pocket. The audience hears L.A.'s hysterical laughter as she leaves, until the opening and closing of a door is heard, and the laughter dies away.

Coke48kenshin comes back seven minutes later and sits at L.A.'s desk. She turns to the audience and says, "Yeah. Swearing in front of LonelyArtist, not a good thing. She'll be taking the rest of the show off tonight, so I'll be taking over. We have time for..." Coke48 looks at her wrist (which had a wristwatch). "...two more quetions. So Tails," she said, turning to Tails, "I hate you almost as much as LoneyArtist does, but anyway. Some gamers would like to know: Have you ever been to Hawaii?"

Tails looks smug. "I used to live there."

Coke48 looks sceptical. "Really? Can you prove it?"

"Do you have a ukulele?"

Coke48 scrunches up her eyebrows. She then pulls a drawer out of L.A.'s desk, and pulls out a ukulele. "I thought she might have one somewhere..."

Tails takes the ukulele and strums the strings for a minute. Then he begins to play and sing. "Let's talk dirty in Hawaiin, it's the---"

"Yeah okay, enough, enough," Coke48 waves to be quiet. Tails sets the ukulele on the floor. "That answers that question. Last question of the day now...What's your favorite food?"

"I like suugar."

"Um...Can you give me something specific?"

"I like suugar..."

"Specific, Tails."

Tails blinked. "I like suuugar..." He explained.

"Alright, that's good enough for me!" Coke48 exclaims. "I've gotta see LonelyArtist before visiting hours are over. This has been LonelyArtist's talk show: Let's see how soon the replacement comes!"

**Cameras Off**

_Yep. So that was my show. I hope you liked it. I didn't. So yeah. The first alien, humanoid, or god to review this gets to decide the next topic. Bye ya'll!_


	4. Episode 4

_Hey. I'm doing the request of Marie the Hedgecat. He/She wasn't the first to review, but the first to request. So yeah. Oh, and...Somebody requested Big the Cat. Yeah, um...I've only deafeted SA2B, so I know very little about the other characters. My sister and neice destroyed my Sonic Heroes game, and I haven't played any others. I might do him, Cream, etc. if nobody else has a different request, but...I'd probably mess up a lot of facts and junk. And I know nothing about Espio, Vector, or Charmy. Don't ask. I might be able to google them though..._

**Talk Show #4**

**Cameras On**

_Announcer: "Weeellcooome Baaaaaack, Rrrreaders! This is LonelyArtist's Talk Show! Where you never know what's gonna happen next! In today's episode: Amy the Hedgehog! What's her job? Why is she obsessed with Sonic? Why is her hair pink? That and more on today's episode! Now, please give a round of applause for your host, LonelyArtist!"_

((applause))

LonelyArtist walks on stage, and plops down on her desk. She looks at the audience with bloodshot eyes. "Please..." she groans. "Don't applaud so loud. I have a major headache." The applause dies down. LonelyArtist pops a pill into her mouth and looks up. "As you know, I had gone...mentally ill...last episode. I'm still a little sensitive, and I've named the voice in my head Ben. So bear with me. Anyway, before we begin, the regular announcements: I'm insanely tired, and I'm addicted to the medication Coke48kenshin gave me. Anyway. Do you all want a woman on this show?"

((mutterings and a few hoo-hahs))

"Well then welcome our guest of honor, Amy Rose! Oh! But please. Keep it down to a dull roar," she added quickly.

((little applause))

L.A. pops another pill into her mouth as the pink wonder walks on from stage right. She sits delicately into the armchair.

L.A. looks at her and speaks. "So, Amy..."

"Yes?"

"I understand you're only about a year younger than I, correct?"

"Um...sure."

"Cool. I was just wondering. Anyway. Next question. What exactly do you do with Sonic and the gang?"

Amy tilted her head to one side. "Come again?"

"You know...Why are you _there_?" L.A. said.

Amy smiled. "Oh! I help them."

L.A. looks at the camera with distaste. She pops another pill into her mouth before continuing. "Alright...Next question. Can you be a bit more specific?"

Amy giggles. "Okay. I do things such as simple fighting, which can come in handy, mind you. Like one time, I fired a spitball into a robot's circuitry system. Which was a good thing, because Sonic had tripped, the clumsy clutz, and the robot was right there! So, I thought, geez! Don't robots run on electronics? And I figured, one of two things can bring electricity down. Water, or, like, paper or some other insulator that doesn't conduct electricity. But since I couldn't remember if both worked, or just one, I figured, why not a spitball? It contains both. And just my luck I was sitting at a cafe that Sonic had brought me to, he's such a darling, and there was a straw and napkin right in front of me! It was so simple! But then the spitball wouldn't fit in the straw, so I just threw it. Then Sonic bought me some hand sanitizer, he was so grateful. Or at least I think he was. He could have just not wanted my germs on his hand when we held hands. He never did try to hold my hand though, he must be really paranoid of germs. Oh! And I also give optimistic talks behind the scenes! Like once, Tails couldn't think of an invention to invent to save the world! So I said, 'Tails! Maybe I can help!" But Tails didn't believe I could help, so I decided to prove it! And I said, 'Remember that one time I helped Sonic? I fired a spitball into a robot's circuitry system. Which was a good thing, because Sonic had tripped, the clumsy clutz, and the robot was right there! So, I thought, geez! Don't robots run on electronics? And I figured, one of two things can bring electricity down. Water, or, like, paper or some other insulator that doesn't conduct electricity. But since I couldn't remember if both worked, or just one, I figured, why not a spitball? It contains both. And just my luck I was sitting at a cafe that Sonic had brought me to, he's such a darling, and there was a straw and napkin right in front of me! It was so simple! But then the spitball wouldn't fit in the straw, so I just threw it. Then Sonic bought me some hand sanitizer, he was so grateful. Or at least I think he was. He could have just not wanted my germs on his hand when we held hands. He never did try to hold my hand though, he must be really paranoid of germs.' And then Tails nodded slowly and got to work on his invention. Maybe that information on electronics helped, you never know. And I take care of the chao, because everyone else is busy saving the world. The only time I ever get to help is by chance. Like one time, I fired a spitball into a robot's circuitry system. Which was a good thing, because Sonic had tripped, the clumsy clutz, and the robot was right there! So, I thought, geez! Don't robots run on electronics? And I figured, one of two things can bring electricity down. Water, or, like, paper or some other insulator that doesn't conduct electricity. But since I couldn't remember if both worked, or just one, I figured, why not a spitball? It contains both. And just my luck I was sitting at a cafe that Sonic had brought me to, he's such a darling, and there was a straw and napkin right in front of me! It was so simple! But then the spitball wouldn't fit in the straw, so I just threw it. Then Sonic bought me some hand sanitizer, he was so grateful. Or at least I think he was. He could have just not wanted my germs on his hand when we held hands. He never did try to hold my hand though, he must be really paranoid of germs. But, I guess that's all I do." **If you read all that word by word, you must be really bored.**

A person with black hair and clothes runs in, points at Amy, and yells, "Why the heck are you pink? Why do you talk so much!" and then runs off.

L.A. and Amy blink. L.A. is the first to speak. "S-sorry 'bout that, Amy. That was Hiei's-lover-16. another friend of mine. But I guess that can be the next question. Why are you pink?"

Amy laughs. "I'm asked that quite a bit. Let's see...I used to be normal colored, but then I got this crazy idea that I would dye my hair pink!"

"So it's just died?" L.A. asks, disappointed.

"Well, it was supposed to be, but while I was dying it, the person who lived in the apartment above me flushed toxic waste down the toilet, and it came out of the shower spout. So I was turned into this pink, hedgehog thing."

"Seriously?" L.A. asks, interested. Amy nods. "That's really cool." Amy nods again, kind of weirded out. "Well, anyway," L.A. says, sitting up, "Next question. Let's see...next question...Amy why don't you ask me a question?"

"Um...okay..." Amy says. She thinks. "How about...Can I have your dog tag?" Amy asks, referring to the dog tag around L.A.'s neck.

"No."

"Okay, well that was my question."

L.A. frowns. "Ookay. Well, I can't think of anything else to ask you so...GET OFF MY SHOW!" Amy runs off crying. L.A. turns back to the audience. She says in a bored voice, "Well, that's been LonelyArtist's Talk Show: Boring the Audience to Death! Come back again, ya'll."

**Cameras Off**

_Ugh. Sorry 'bout that one. That was truly awful. But I didn't know what to ask her. So yeah, please recommend topics, and questions to ask them. And review. Please._


	5. Episode 5

Disclaimer: I don't any of these humanimals.

(I know most of you call them mobians, but I prefer humanimals. So there.)

_Yeeha! I got more reviews! Go L.A. Go L.A. It's ya birthday. It's ya birthday. No seriosly. It is today!_

_So I'm doing the request of what pretty much all of you requested. Yippee!_

_Oh and...It'll get a little weird later on..._

**Talk Show #5**

**Cameras On**

_Announcer: "Gooooooooooood evening, Rreeaders! Welcome back to LonelyArtist's Talk Show! Today's topic: Rouge the Bat! What's her heritage? What is her future? Why is she so se--_" "THIS IS RATED K!" "_--I mean drop dead gorgeus? That and more on today's episode! And now, let's hear a hearty welcome to your host, LonelyArtist!"_

((applause))

An over-confident LonelyArtist waltzes onstage. Today she wears a black cape over her normal clothes. Before sitting down, she throws off the cape, which flutters down in a heap behind her chair. She sits down and looks at the audience.

"I'm very sorry for all that, but I just got a theatrical flair. It also might have been because of the Careers class I just got done with. We took this personality test, and it said I was slightly introverted. Which means mildly shy. ME! SHY! So I've just been trying to prove it wrong. Yeah. Anyway, my usual announcements: I forgot to go to band practice today, and, if you haven't noticed, I got new glasses! Don't they look rad?"

A tomato splats on her face. "You're still as ugly as ever!"

L.A. frowns and yells, "Grab that man, and...throw him out the third story window! Oh wait. K+. Put a mattress under it!" Two flying robot...things...flew out of nowhere, swooping down, grabbing a member of the audience, and flying off with him. A scream is heard. "Okay. That was the wrong person, it wasn't even a man, but...I think it got the point across. Anyway! Please welcome our guest of honor, Rouge the Bat!"

((applause))

Rouge flies on stage with a flourish and lands elegantly on the armchair. "Thank you! Thank you!" she cries to the audience. "Stick around after the show and I will _personally _steal your valuables!" The crowd cheers louder. Rouge tosses her head in a seductive kind of way, making a few men in the audience drop.

L.A. waits til the crowd calms down. "I see you've got quite a fan base, Rouge."

"Well who couldn't, if they had my personality?"

"I'm sure it's not your personality..." L.A. murmers.

"What did you say?" Rouge asks innocently. "I didn't hear."

"Never you mind. Anyways, I've always wondered this, but...you have no hair..."

Rouge's smile fades. "Do you know how many times I get asked that a day?"

L.A. blinks. "No. How much?"

"Never."

L.A. blinks again. If she liked anime, there would have been a sweat drop, but I think the animators have learned their lesson. "Okay. That takes care of the first question..." she says, not wanting to go into more insane ramblings. "Okay. So...next question?"

"Next question." Rouge says, cheered up a bit.

"Good. What's your heritage?"

"Well, I'm a vampire bat, as it shows from the fangs. Mostly so, actually. But I'm a bit human. My great great great great times whatever grandmother was an Aztec. That's where I get my drop dead self. Right boys?"

A few hoo-hahs, cheers, whistles, and swooning sounds are heard from the audience.

L.A. however, is intrigued. "Aztec? Wow! That must be where you get your love for jewels! I don't have any special blood in me. I've got stuff like Swedish and Irish, but that's as exotic as it gets. But Aztec? Hmm...isn't Knuckles Mayan?"

"I dunno."

"Well, Tikal is his tribe girl...and Tikal was a mayan city. Maybe...anyway, do you think maybe your ancestors could have met up with Knuckles' ancestors, and you're, like, destined to either kill eachother or fall madly in love?"

"Madly in love?" Rouge draws back. "You mean with eachother, or just, madly in love with _somebody_?"

L.A. thinks. "I don't know," she says in a far away voice. "You make me think," she tells Rouge. "I like to think. Give me a minute." L.A. leans back in her chair and stares at the ceiling. She starts muttering things, and a few sound like math problems. She finally leans back. "Just with any old person." She informs Rouge.

Rouge nods. "Then yes," she says. "Definately destined."

"Awesome." L.A. nods slowly.

"It is quite radical, yes," Rouge says, a bit confused.

"Okay, so what do you have planned for your future?"--rapid change of subject

Rouge scrunches up her face in thought. "Probably go on treasure hunting for another ten years or so. Then maybe I'll slow down and start a family or something. Have a few bat children. It's so hard to find male bats nowadays though..."

"Could you crossbreed?" L.A. asks, interested.

Rouge nods. "It's possible, but sometimes it gets miscaried or deformed or something."

L.A. by now is truly into this topic. "That's cool. So what do you plan on doing if you can't find a male bat?"

Rouge shrugs. "Marry somebody else, steal his stuff, run off, and adopt a kid."

L.A. is amazed. "Somebody with something you want?"

"How could I find an adoptable kid with something I want?"

L.A. shakes her head. "No. I mean a husband with something you want."

Rouge laughs. "Of course!"

"How about the master emerald."

"Now why would I marry the master emerald!"

L.A. is silent for a while.

Rouge gets it. "NO! I will _never_ even think of getting close to that _thing_! Knuckles is an enemy, nothing more."

Out in the audience, the heart of a red echidna breaks. It makes the sound of a vase that nobody was around to hear. Sad, but nearly inaudible.

Rouge hears this. Her eyes widen. She goes to the front of the stage with a look of deep guilt and remorse, searching for her loved one. "No..." she says to the audience. "No, Knuckles..."

But it is too late. With a cry of anguish, Knuckles falls over and dies.

"STOP!" L.A. yells. "Whoever wrote this script, is fired!"

"Sorry, boss!" says Guess Who.

"Guess Who! What are you doing working for me? Where's Coke48kenshin?"

"You fired her remember?" yells Guess Who.

L.A. frowns. "Oh. Well, you're fired, Guess Who. Tell Hiei's-lover-16 that she's hired, and tell Coke48kenshin that she's fired again."

"Will do, boss!" Guess Who salutes.

"I hate those optimists. Anyway, rewind!"

"!dniwer,yawynA.stsimitpoesohtetahI".setulasohWssiuG"!ssob,dolliW"".naigaderifs'eshtahtnihsnek84ekoClletdna,derihs'hestaht61-revol-s'ieiHlleT.ohWsseuG,derifer'uoy,lleW.hO".snworf.A.L.ohWssueGslley"?rebmemerrehderifouY""?nihsnek84ekoCs'erehW?emrofgnikrowgnioduoyeratahW!ohWsseuG".ohWsseuGsyas"!ssob,yrroS""!derefsi,tpircssihtetorwreveohw".slley.A.L."!POTS".seiddnarevosllafselkcunK,hsiuganfoyrcahtiW.etalootsitituB"...selkcunK,oN".ecneiduaehtotsyasehs"...oN".enodevolrehrofgnihcraes,esromerdnatliugpeedfokoolahtiwegatsehtfotnorfehtotseogehS.nediwseyereH.sihtsraeheguoR.elbiduaniylraentub,daS.raehotdnuorasawydobonthatgnihsarcesavafodnuosehtsekamtI.skaerbandihcaderafotraeheht,ecneiduaehtnituO

**The first reviewer who finds an error wins...um...three imaginary dollars! And maybe a feature in another one of my stories/chapters...**

**See those three stars up the page a ways? That's where the rewinding begins.**

So Knuckles wasn't in the audience, his heart doesn't break, Rouge doesn't get guilty, and Knuckles doesn't die.

"Okay, so now we have to wing it, Rouge. Why is Knuckles just an enemy?" L.A. asked "symphathetically." **That's a _really_ hard word to spell.**

Rouge shrugs. "Well. I guess rival, really. We don't despise eachother like we used to. But we have no...um..._feeling_...for eachother. Or at least I don't for him."

"Okay," L.A. nods. "Fair enough. Let's see...next question...CRAP! I can't think of a question! Um...Ooh! What are your favorite kinds of jewels?"

Rouge raises an eyebrow. "It took you that long to think of _that_? Anyway...my favorite jewel...I'd have to say sapphires...I love the blue. It reminds me..."

"Reminds you of what? The ocean? The lake? The sky? A puddle? Food dye? Knuckles' eyes? Rib--" **Ribbons**

Rouge shoots up. "It's _not _Knuckles' eyes! Why do you keep bringing him up!"

L.A. blinks. "Well, gee, I was gonna say Tails' eyes a little later...and then maybe later my eyes, too!" She grins a toothy grin.

Rouge blushes. "Oh...sorry I got so worked up..."

"S'okay."

Just then, the stage door bursts open, and there stands Knuckles.

"Aaaauugh!" L.A. screams. "Knuckles! What are you doing here? I have a show to run! Stay out! Rewind rewind rewind!"

"Sorry, boss, no can do!" Hiei's-lover-16 shouts. "We're running out of tape! If we rewind again, we may not be able to continue!"

L.A. sulks. "Hiei's-lover, you're fired. Man, I'm running out of employees here."

Hiei's-lover bursts out laughing as she walks out the door.

L.A. groans. "Why does she think I'm funny? She always thinks I'm funny!" she asks No-One in Particular.

No-One screams, "Why are you asking me? I live in Particular for gosh sake! How would I know!"

L.A. smiles sheepishly. "Sorry. Anyway, Knuckles, Rouge, carry on."

"And what makes you think I'm involved!" Rouge yells.

L.A. shrugs. "I'm psychic."

Rouge grumbles as L.A. leans back in her chair and puts her hands behind her head. "What do you want, Knucklehead?"

Knuckles smiles into the camera. "Well, I was just watching this show, and I remembered that I had lost a bet with Sonic and still had to humiliate myself on national fanfics. So I came over here to do so."

L.A. nods. "Go ahead. I could use the publicity."

Knuckles nods nervously. He walks up to Rouge and kneels before her. "Rouge the Bat! Will you marry me!"

Dead...Silence.

Then people start to react. L.A. chokes on her chewing gum. The audience does a hodgepodge **New vocabulary word for your kids, moms. It means "an assortment of unlike items; a jumble."** of things. Most of the women put their hands to their hearts and say, "Aww." Though some react with hoots shouts, and jealousy if they liked Knuckles like I do. The men hooted, yelled, and some cried if they liked Rouge like every male does.

Knuckles almost faints with embarrassment.

And Rouge. Rouge squeels with delight and yells, "YES!"

Knuckles gets up. "See Sonic!" He yells into the cameras. "I told you she'd say no--------wait..._YES!_" He spins around and faces Rouge, wide-eyed.

Rouge nods eagerly. Her fangs show because she's smiling so much. "Yes, Knuckles! YES!"

Knuckles groans and sinks down onto the floor. "Man," he whispers."What do I do now?" He gets up and says to Rouge, "Rouge, maybe you don't know, but we're still under 18..."

L.A. groans and puts her head on her desk.

Rouge is still smiling. "So? We can wait! I'll wait for you forever."

Knuckles appears to be thinking. But he shakes his head. "But college Rouge? I don't know about you, but I'm going to need and education to make a living."

Rouge frowns just a little bit. "No you won't! I'd make lots of money if I sold all the jewels that I accumulate! And you're tons more important than all the jewels in the world!"

Knuckles gags a little. He goes over to the desk and taps L.A.'s head. She looks up. The cameras zoom into their whispering. "I can't break the poor girl's heart." Knuckles whispers. "But watching this episode, I could have sworn that she hated me!"

L.A. nods. "Well, she's a much better liar than you were episode one. You love her too."

Knuckles blushes. "Yeah but...marriage? I'm still 16! I don't even have a ring!"

L.A chuckles softly. She digs around in her desk for a moment and brings out a tiny saphire ring. She hands it to Knuckles. "It's my birthstone," she whispers softly. "You can borrow it, but I expect at least a plastic one back."

Knuckles sighs in relief. "Thank you," he whispers, squeezing her hand in gratitude.

When he turns around, Rouge's eyes are blazing. Knuckles steps back, toppling over the desk and into L.A.'s lap. L.A. coughs out something inaudible because of Knuckles' tremendous weight, even if it was muscle.

Rouge stands up and yanks Knuckles off her. She slaps him in the face. "Don't think I didn't hear a word you said!" She points to her ears. "Think these ears are just for decoration! I'm blind without them!" **Fact: All bats, except fruit bats, are blind. They see with inaudible sound waves bouncing off obstacles.** She slaps him again. "You really didn't want to marry me! You just wanted to be in another fanfic!"

Knuckles rubs his cheek. "Didn't I say at the beginning that I was just here to humiliate myself?"

That wasn't the right thing to say. Rouge roars. "You wanted to humiliate yourself! As in...marrying me would mortify you!" Rouge punches him in the face, and Knuckles falls to the ground. But only momentarily. He jumps up and gives her a slug in the stomach. Rouge cripple over.

Knuckles, breathing a little extra because of the shock, walks over to the silently crying Rouge. He picks her up in his arm. He says to her, "Now that you've calmed down, I didn't mean it like that. I'm just really not ready. Okay?" This doesn't have the desired effect, and Rouge bites him in the neck.

"Oh no!" Knuckles cries. "I'm turning into a vampire bat! Just like a vampire! Noooo!" A minute later, Knuckles flies off into the night with his newly grown wings, followed by his master, Rouge.

L.A. sighs. She looks at her audience, which has since become nonexistant. She looks at the broken furnisher, the papers scattered in the audience's hasty retreat. She sighed once more, and walked off the stage.

**Cameras Off**

_Yep. Told you it'd get weird. I didn't even finish the rest of the questions._

_Anyway, there's one more episode left! Whoever, like I said, finds the first error in the rewind, will be a character in the finale! If they consent, of course. As for requests, I'm not taking any! I already have it planned who I'm going to do. Will it actually be Sonic for once? Or will I skip him completely and work on slightly more abstract characters, like Eggman or Metal Sonic? Only time will tell!_

_Oh yeah. Sorry I haven't written in a while. It was my birthday recently, and I got The Sims 2 Nightlife, which is an _awesome _game! I've been playing that. So yeah. Sorry._


	6. Episode Finale

Disclaimer: I don't own these crazy SEGA characters!

_I am really sorry I haven't written lately. Please forgive me. And read this. And review it. Please. Please. Please. Pickles. Please._

**Talk Show Finale**

**Cameras On**

_Announcer: Hellloooooooo Readers! Welcome to LonelyArtist's Talk Show! Today's Topic: The one, the only, SONIC THE HEDGEHOG! Where did he obtain his super powers? Why does he choose to use them for good? Why is he not worth featuring first? That and more on today's episode! And now, give a worthy round of applause for your host, LonelyArtist!_

((applause etc.))

LonelyArtist runs onstage and collapses on top of her desk. "They're...they're...they're everywhere! Those crazy fans keep attacking me!" LonelyArtist lies there panting a moment, then looks up. "Where are the crazy fans?" She sits up angrily **Sitting up angrily. Hmmm...** "I pay them five bucks each, and they bail out on me. Talk about pirates!" She looks around. "I kinda like it here on top of this desk. It makes me feel tall. I'm a short tall person, so this makes me feel sorta special." She grins. "So now we'll bring out our special guest. Sonic the Hedgehog!"

((applause))

In a blue blur, Sonic is on the seat by the desk.

"Wow!" LonelyArtist exlcaims, "I've heard you're fast, but...wow!"

Sonic rolls his eyes. "Of _course_ I'm fast, girlie--"

"Hmph."

"That's, like, my only super power."

L.A. tilts her head. "Hm. Really?"

Sonic blinks. "What? I mean--no! I've got lots of super powers. 'Cause I'm the greatest." He runs a hand through his quills.

"Mm-hmm..." L.A. scratches something down on a notepad that somehow wound up in her hands. "So Sonic, where did you get all these super powers?"

"Eh?"

"You know, how'd you get 'em? Were you born with 'em, or did you roll around in nuclear waste? Did your parents appeal to the Great God of Greatness?"

"I'm gonna go with that last one," he says. "Only it was more like the G.G. of G. appealed to my parents. He/She/It knew I had great talent but that I needed some powers to be able to fight the evil Eggman and Co. So It/She/He begged mumsie--"

"Mumsie?"

"--Yes Mumsie!--and Father to allow me to be given special gifts. And that's how it happened."

"Fascinating..." L.A. mutters, writing furiously. **Not angry furious.** "Now would you care to tell the audience who your greatest enemy is?"

Sonic crosses his arms. "Knuckles."

L.A. continues writing. "Dr. Eg--what?"

"Knuckles."

"Well...why is Knuckles your biggest enemy?"

Sonic sighs. "He's out to steal my girl."

L.A. smiles. "So who's your girl?"

"Rouge."

L.A. continues writing still. "Amy Ro--what?"

Sonic uncrosses his arms. "Rouge."

L.A. blinks. "R-_Rouge?_ But isn't she _Knuckles' _girl?"

"I am _not _a ((beep)) piece of property!" a female voice yells from the audience.

"No," Sonic says stubbornly. "She's my girl. She's a heck of a lot, erm, prettier, than _Amy_."

"Tsk tsk tsk," L.A. tsks. "Next question, how 'bout. Why have you decided to use your powers for good?"

Sonic grins. "'Cause chicks dig heros."

"Um...actually, last time I checked, Shadow is really rising in popularity. They've even got a video game just for him. Which is so flippin' awesome I might add. I got it for Christmas, and I _love _it! Except--"

"Yeah, but he doesn't count," Sonic says with a scoff. "Shadow isn't exactly a hero or a villian. He just kinda does what he wants."

"So would you consider Shadow an ally or a rival?"

Sonic thinks for a moment. "I'd say an ally, depending on which story you follow in Shadow the Hedgehog. But if you forget that video game completely, I'd say ally. He helped me out in SA2B, and besides Shadow the Hedgehog that's the only one the author has completed, so as far as she knows, he's an ally."

LonelyArtist sulks. "It's not my fault I stink at video games. I have no instinctive hand eye coordination." She suddenly perked up. "Anyway. I'm running out of patience, so Sonic, why weren't you featured first do _you _think?"

Sonic looks bewildered. "_You_ answer that question. My theory is that you saved the best for last!"

LonelyArtist giggles. "Nope! Well, I featured Knuckles first because he's my _all time favorite character_! And I guess I did you last because---nobody recommended you. I'm sorry, but you seem to be the least popular of your video games. Or maybe you're _so_ popular that the paparazzi have already exploited every detail about your life, from how you wear blue socks to how outside your video games, you're madly in love with Amy, but the producers thought that was too humdrum."

Sonic goes pale.

"You mean it's _true_! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!"

"Um, no. It's not. But it's close. More like Knuckles and Rouge are second cousins, I'm in love with Rouge, and Knuckles hates Amy."

"Um. Interesting."

"Very."

"So, I guess my last question is, what else did the video game and comic book producers lie about?"

Sonic rolls his eyes. "The chili dogs! I'm a vegetarian! I don't eat meat!"

"I'm gonna end this right here. For one thing, I'm bored of this story, for another, I'm bored of this story."

"You said that reason twice."

"That's because I'm twice as bored as usual. This ends LonelyArtist's talk show! Forever!"

**Cameras Off**

_Sniff. I'm gonna miss this show. Screw it, I am not! It's over! Yippee! I can stop writing stupid episodes and blackmailing people into writing positive reviews, I mean---nothing. Whatever, I'm tired. Bood bye, and good night._

_zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz_


	7. Documentary

**Talk Show Documentary**

**Cameras On**

_Dedicated to My Fans._

Apparantly this was one of my more popular stories. I'm going to share a review with you from Dragonbreath1, my favorite author on this entire website:

----------------------

Over. Over? Woah, woah, woah, OVER! CURSE YOU! You're just like test-driving a mercedes! So good...so enjoyed...AND THEN TAKEN AWAY! GRAARRG! CURSE YOU, BATMAN! CURSE YOU!1!UNO!

GET BACK ON YOUR LAZY BUM AND GET WRITING, GIRLIE! THIS SITE HAS TOO FEW DECENT AUTHORS TO LOSE ONE WITHOUT AN EXCESSIVE AMOUNT OF COMPLAINING!

----------------------------------------------------------------

I must say I was deeply flattered. I had even based this story on Dragonbreath1's "Tails Explains." I'm gonna say this: If you fans really want me to make 'Talk Show' 2nd season, I need at least ten reviews saying they want the second season. Whether you need to log in as several people to get that, I don't care. I just need ten reviews.

And Dragonbreath1: I would like to know if you are male or female. I'm thinking male, based on your writing. But I'm not for sure. Man, if only you could autograph the copy of "Suitcaseor Headcase" that I printed out and showed to all my friends. I would go as far as to say you're my favorite AUTHOR. Your writing is that good.

**Cameras Off**

P.S. In "Anything but Relaxing," Knuckles is not a marsupial! Yes, Drangonbreath1,you were the starred out person in chapter 1! Don't sue me!


End file.
